Injection class for IVF

I'm back. Geez, I dropped off this blog awhile ago but I feel I just have to document this step in our baby/babies journey.

Update: We decided to go to IVF in July 2009. They said we would have to take a break for a month and then another month or so to get approval. So, I thought September/October. Well, it took four months just to get the approval. I was so mad. If I had known, I would have just finished up our last month on clomid. Of course, we prayed for a baby to appear in those months we were waiting for our IVF approval....please don't let it come to this. But it did. So, I've been on birth control pills for the last month and on Sunday, we begin our Lupron injections.

I have an Excel calendar that I made up with my IVF calendar so I've been crossing off each day, so anxious for something to start. To be able to do something. I read somewhere that no matter your fear with needles, you get excited about injections just because it's so rare that there's something physical that you can do that feels like you're actually doing something. That you're controlling something that might actually help you have a baby. It's so true.

Today was our injection class. I brought questions and I fully expected to do it myself and have Scott assist so that he could do it if needed. I was totally wrong. He had to learn it all by himself. The only one a little more ataken back by that was him. I think the term "injection class" is a little misleading. I pictured some slides and videos...a powerpoint presentation, with a slow hands-on introduction to needles and such. The nurse, a sweet nurse but she had a thick Chinese accent, took us into a small office and immediately started dumping needles on her desk. I was delighted when she said that she was going to teach Scott (I can't keep referring him to as a nameless guy...I think he has a pretty common enough name that I'll just use it without fear of people finding us on the web....but I'm still anonymous) and that I didn't need to really learn. He should do all the shots. Oh, thank God. The relief was immense. Then she said that she was going to have him practice giving me shots today. Oh, stress level back up to ten. Whoa, what? I read on blogs that people practiced on oranges and then maybe once on themselves.

She starts to show him and I start scribbling down every little word and direction in my little notepad. She speaks seriously like 85 words per minute...and with that thick accent. Whoo, we both were getting a little overwhelmed. She showed him to pull the liquid out of the vial into the syringe. And when we pointed out the little air bubbles in Scott's syringe, she paused for 0.01 seconds and waved it off and said "that won't kill her, they too little." Wait, wait, at what size might they possible kill me. Thankfully, she let him empty the syringe and try again. He was just practicing with a saline solution.

Then it was time for him to give me the shot of saline for practice. I immediately felt my pulse accelerating, my breathing started to get shallow and rapid, and I was gripping my chair. Needles freak me out. I think my eyes were getting a little wide as the nurse and Scott both turned my way. The nurse must have sensed it because she came to stand by my side under the pretense of supervising Scott but I think it was so she could grip my arms and make sure I didn't bolt. I had the foresight to wear shorts to the appointment. I couldn't believe they don't tell you that important but I read that they like you to practice once in front of them. So, there's my left handed hubby gripping a small needle in his hand. His other hand is on my leg circling the area he's eyeing. And my heart is going crazy. He's staring at my leg and he keeps asking the nurse nonstop questions quickly. He's nervous, he's scared. I can totally tell, he's asking "do I do it now? Are you ready?" The nurse tells him "Yes, do it now." He lines it up and then he keeps asking "Now? Do I do it now? " I realize that he's not sure if he can do it and I start getting freaked. What if he gets scared and stabs me in the wrong place? Then I start laughing, nervously. Then he starts laughing, nervously. Now, he's holding a needle inches away from my leg and shuddering with laughter. Aw, so dangerous. It was like a bloopers reel, it took forever for us to calm down. And he gave me the shot, and it seriously was not bad. It's a real small needle. That's for the Lupron injections to have daily. Lupro.n is to suppress my egg ovulation to keep me from ovulating before we're ready.

The next thing he practiced was my injections for Bravel.le and Men.opur. this one he had to use one syringe to draw out of four different vials first. This one will be injected into my stomach. Thankfully, she had a fake square that he just practiced injecting into. Awesome, that was easy for me. Bravel.le and Men.opur are the drugs that simulate FSH and LH which women produce naturally every time that stimulate egg production.

The injections above are subcutaneous injections. This means that they are small needles that inject just below the skin layer into the fatty layer. The nurse said that it hurts less because the needles are smaller and because it's going into fat. I was stoked. Oooh, I have plenty of fat. You mean it's going to come in handy. Even better is when I had changed into my shorts for the first practice injection and she practically shrieked in glee at the sight of my legs. Scott swears she said "oh, those legs are good and wide." She quickly changed it to saying that I had great legs for these injections because my skin is so "soft." Nice.

The last injection he had to practice is IM, and intramuscular injection. This injection will have to be in my rear end, although it was higher than I thought, it was more my waist and nearer the hip. This one had a long needle and she told me to stand against the wall with my weight on one leg so that the other side was nice and relaxed. She directed me to lean against the wall and pull down my shorts to expose a cheek. Whoa, I was not prepared for this. I don't think I have seen my rear end in years, I wasn't really expecting to have a stranger using it as a lesson. Not to mention the wide panoramic bay window along the opposite office wall. I asked her if maybe we should close the blinds first. In her quick maternal way, she brushed off my silly request and said "No worry, no one going see you." Hmmm, we are on the ninth floor but I can still clearly see the windows of the 15th floor apartment building across the way. Hey, at this point, I don't care. There is no modesty inf ertility treatment. Your body is no longer a private matter. So, I faced the wall and obliged.

The rear end shot...yah, that one hurt. It stunk for like an hour afterward. Boy, if we get pregnant, we have to do that shot every day for the first trimester. I can see how your rear end feels like a bruised grape by the end...still all worth it.

well, that was today. We're hiding our medicine in a drink fridge that we snuck into our bedroom. I don't feel comfortable telling my roommate just yet. But I have a few friends that I trust and want to share this journey with. Thanks for reading.