Weight: 208 lb
Symptoms: horrible nausea, gagging, dry heaving, motion sickness, constipation, napping daily, lackluster
Food aversions: Most food
Okay food: random right now, I could go for a Caesar salad, i like meatloaf or hamburger steak, i always seem to want dairy like chocolate milk, but it makes me feel sick afterward
So, last week the nausea got super bad. I upped my 2 pills of zo.fran to 3 pills a day....some days were four. I called the clinic and thankfully they said that I could increase my dose to 4 pills a day but that was the maximum. After that, to try it with sea bands and/or B6 if it wasn't enough. I told them that sea bands didn't work for me the first time and they said you never know....it might this time around. Even with the four pills, I was sick...I just wanted to call in sick and crawl into bed and cry until 20 weeks. I tried B6 pills and am only taking two 50 mg a day with food...the nurse said you can go up to 200 mg daily. It seemed to work...really well...but the side effect was that I suspect that the combination of medicine is knocking me out. I took B6 for the first time friday night, then proceeded to sleep in the next morning...get up briefly...and then nap uncontrollably to 2 in the afternoon. Almost all of Saturday, I didn't feel nauseous but I felt completely drugged. Since then, I've been oscillating between being nauseous and being sedated and drowsy. Trying not to take both things at once.
On Friday, we went to our second ultrasound...our 10 week ultrasound. We couldn't find a sitter so our baby C was with us. Baby bean is still small but amazingly starting to form shape. I could see the arms and the legs, and every now and then baby bean would jump off the side of the sac. So amazing. The ultrasound helps but still doesn't make it feel real. I just feel sick. I don't feel pregnant. I don't feel special. I don't feel like that little bouncing gummy bear on the screen is in side me. Then they listened to the heart beat which was in the 180s and sounded great and I looked up to my baby C in my husband's arms, watching the screen listening to her sibling's heartbeat for the first time and I started to tear.
I have a regular OB appt this Thursday at 11 weeks and then a first screen/NT scan next week Tuesday.
My hubby and I had a rough week last week. I'm miserable and depressed from being sick. He's having to do everything and he's getting overwhelmed and miserable himself. So, we're both feeling depressed and neither of us can help the other...we got into a huge fight. Selfishly, I just wished he would just suck it up. I keep thinking that if he can just suck it up and do it for the next few weeks, I'll make up for it when I feel better. And he feels he's doing everything he possible can. So, with the medicine and B6, I have tried to make an effort to do more...although it be pitiful.. I washed bottles on Friday night. Whoohoo, start the ticker tape parade.
I'm struggling at work...thankfully, this week looks like it might be a little less stressful. I'm just trying to survive...although it gets really sloppy. I don't know if my absences are getting noticeable. I can't call in sick because my job doesn't work like that, I have things that need to get done with daily deadlines. And I am trying to keep what little sick leave I have for maternity leave...when I take maternity leave, I'll have only had this job for exactly one year. Something I'm worried that my workplace isn't really going to like after hiring me. I tried telling one of my coworkers today...we're pretty close...but she's also very critical. I would have loved to have someone at work who knew what was going on and would understand why I'm leaving work early or just working from home. Websites say to talk to your work early if you're having a rough trimester and maybe they can work with you until you get past the hard part. My coworker didn't receive it that great. Not exactly an excited response. It was like a "oh" followed by monotone questions "how old is your other baby?" "was this natural?"...then a long time later "well, I guess...congratulations?!" Oh well, this is my life...my family...and I have a right to have family. I just know it will be a huge inconvenience and problem at work. We don't exactly have people that can cover for our positions.
Now being past 10 weeks, I can only hope that the next few weeks fly by and that i see improvement in my symptoms with each week. Reading my blog from the first pregnancy, I know it was a roller coaster ride...I'm hoping I still see an easier ride. I know it was pretty much gone by 16 weeks and got better by 14 weeks. I'm just a few days away from 11....I'm hoping that by 12, there might be some change...then 14...then 16. That makes it easier for me to think of then...just 5.5 weeks more 16 weeks. That's over a month. I'm going to just try to get to 12 and 14. Much more doable.
I also regret taking on photography gigs. Seriously, I wish I could cancel the one I have this week. I completely forgot what it was like during the first trimester. NEVER EVER book jobs for the first trimester.
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